My friends J and E and myself went on one of our semi-regular bicycle rides in Bangkok last week. As you may have read on this blog before (or seen elsewhere), we enjoy getting out to explore the hidden corners of the city in all its gritty, awful, wonderful glory. But we weren’t prepared for how epic this ride would be and how quickly we’d be reminded of how truly surprising Thailand is. We also weren’t prepared to handle our incredibly poor sense of direction, as you’ll see below. The Star Wars reference is easy to explain, but as for the strange temple… I’m just glad I had my camera.

The beginning of our ride was great – we had breakfast on Khao San Road, and headed straight up Samsen toward the Rama VII bridge. After riding across the train portion of the bridge (reminding us all of Stand By Me), and past an altar with a strange number of zebra dolls, we got lost in a government compound, exited through a hole cut in a wire fence, stopped for refreshments at a 7-11 where were stared at because we weren’t Thai, and continued on our way. That was Star Wars – new and fun, exciting, enjoyable and something we hadn’t seen before.

Cornflakes and bananas on Khao San Road - what a welcome taste of home!

Cornflakes and bananas on Khao San Road – what a welcome taste of home!

The Empire Strikes Back part of our trip came next – long, depressing and unrelentingly bleak. We were clearly lost, although we thought we weren’t, and were forced to ride along some major roads with some major traffic and major pollution, which is never fun. A couple of close calls, a couple of wrong turns, and we were starting to take bets on if our legs would give out before or after the sun went down.

I don't know what zebras have to do with train bridges, but the large number of offerings made us think the bridge we crossed wasn't as safe as it looked...

I don’t know what zebras have to do with train bridges, but the large number of offerings made us think the bridge we crossed wasn’t as safe as it looked…

Luckily, we asked for directions a few times, and ended up at our destination – Ko Kret, a beautiful little island in the northern part of the city with charming little villages, quiet deserted pathways and friendly locals. However, we were too tired to take a tour, and it was starting to get dark. What to do? Why, buy some beers, rent a boat and fly back downriver, of course, which is exactly what we did. This was Return of the Jedi – a fun, exciting, enjoyable cap on our day. But thankfully without Ewoks.

The strange temple – Wat Sanghatan (only in Thai) – is a very odd place. Foreigners and Thais alike wander around slowly in white robes, chanting in groups and meditating in quiet jungle clearings with monks. It’s all very peaceful – or cultish, depending on your point of view.

At any rate, the highlight was a large structure, built entirely out of wood, the main support beams of which are large carved logs. Each one is carved representing a different country, and this is where the fun part came in. I managed to take a few pictures, but a young monk came up and said I wasn’t allowed to, so I had to stop. But this is what I got:

Get closer, and you can see that each support is carved to represent a different country. This is one is obviously Japan. I mean, France.

Get closer, and you can see that each support is carved to represent a different country. This is one is obviously Japan. I mean, France.

The main structure, made entirely of wood, much of it carved with insane detail.

The main structure, made entirely of wood, much of it carved with insane detail.

turban

Iran.

But the kicker was the pillar for the USA, which showed the Statue of Liberty on one side, and this charming image on the other - the two planes flying into the Twin Towers. Nice craftsmanship, but jeez...

But the kicker was the pillar for the USA, which showed the Statue of Liberty on one side, and this charming image on the other – the two planes flying into the Twin Towers. Nice craftsmanship, but jeez…

With the help of my trusty GPS, we managed to see our day’s progress on Google Earth when we got home and were shocked at just how off-track we were at many times.

This is what an 80km ride looks like. Keep in mind that we thought we were heading more or less North the entire time. I clearly need a compass. Note the ride back on the boat, which condensed a 6-hour bike ride into about 20 minutes. Nice.

This is what an 80km ride looks like. Keep in mind that we thought we were heading more or less North the entire time. I clearly need a compass. Note the ride back on the boat, which condensed a 6-hour bike ride into about 20 minutes. Nice.

So, now that my legs are back to normal and we know to stay off the major roads, maybe we can give it another crack again, and actually get there in time to cross the river and ride around the island.